


Homecoming

by shiannan



Category: Divergent Series - Veronica Roth, In the Flesh (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drama, M/M, zombie!Tris Prior
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-15
Updated: 2017-03-27
Packaged: 2018-04-20 23:02:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4805489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shiannan/pseuds/shiannan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events of Veronica Roth's books a zombie Apocalypse called the Rising similar to the one from "In the Flesh" happens and Tris comes back to life, if her existence can be called life. But everything has changed now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Tris's POV:

I’m leaving the treatment centre with my belongings, looking around nervously. I do hate the Erudites. The funny thing is that they used to tell me back then that there were no Factions now, but the stuff is mostly former henchmen of Janine’s, even wear the blue uniform. They’re standing there, still waiting, seem to be nervous. What if no one is going to come for me? To be honest, I’m worrying about it myself, too.

I’m looking around, trying to spot Four, but I can see only Caleb standing near the gate. I’m overwhelmed with both disappointment and relief — not sure whether I want Four to see me like this. The mousse and my lenses surely do help, but I’m not like them anyway. Already not.

«Hi, baby sister!» Caleb hugs me and kisses me on the cheek in a touching, almost childlike manner. I hug him back. Even after everything that’s happened to us I still love him. And I have no one except Caleb now anyway.

«The guy’s being tough.» one of the doctors whispers behind us. What a tactless prick.

«Used to belong to Erudition.» — Caleb replies, he’s being as arrogant as any of them. They get silent immediately, recognizing Caleb’s right to be almost as fucking cool as they are.

«Do you remember everything about the injections? You must make them every day, or…»

«I have studied all the instructions.»

The doctors nod. Hell yeah, he used to be an Erudite. It was me who was made to repeat all their preaching fifteen times in a row.

My brother takes my suitcase and puts it into the small yellow car’s boot.

«Jump in, Beatrice Lets’s go home.»

If I could weep, I’d weep with adoration, it’s been a way far too cute.

Instead I just wonder: «You can drive a car, can’t you?»

«Indeed I can.» Caleb replies, and I can hear a note of vanity in his voice. «I’ve learnt to cook, too. Can make a chicken stew, you know, like that.»

«Caleb» I interrupt abruptly. «We don’t eat, you know.»

«Yeah.» he says, his gaze averted. He starts the car.

I’m watching the road.

«Where are we going?»

«Home.» he smiles and explains: «I’ve bought a house on the outskirts of the city. Nothing very impressive though, but you’ve got your own room. I’ve put up silvery wallpaper with those blue birds, hope you don’t mind.»

«Where is the money from?»

«Working for a big research company. We former Erudites appear to sell well these days, you know. It turned out that what we used to do for free costs a lot… outside.»

«Have we got … so close with the Outside?»

«Yeah. Especially after The Rising… I mean… Sorry, didn’t want to mention that»

«It’s alright. I remember it, I was there.»

Caleb bites his lip nervously.

«Beatrice, baby sister… I didn’t want to speak about it like, you know, now, but people try not to rise the question, to remember… Well, we all do remember, but you… Let’s better not to, don’t know how to put it… Let’s not announce it. I bought a house quite far from the city, there are few neighbours, but I’ll have to socialize with people anyway, so please, be careful.»

« You mean I’d rather not tell stories about ripping out people’s throats with my teeth?»

«You’d rather not»

How can Caleb stay so calm? Where did he get these nerves of steel? If it runs in the family, what’s wrong with me then?

«Do you live alone?»

And this time his nerve gets twisted.

«Not really.»

«What do you mean, not really?»

«You live with me, don’t you?»

I don’t let him get away.

«You and Susan?»

His face darkens.

«No. Susan died during The Rising.»

Oh, that one was embarrassing. My memories of the events are quite dim, hope at least it wasn’t me who killed her.

«Caleb, you must tell me. What about Four? Does he know about me? He hasn’t visited me in the Treatment Centre, not even once.»

«Of course he does. He’s waiting at home. Christina, too. I shouldn’t have told you, have ruined the surprise.»

My heart could start beating faster on hearing the news. If it could beat, of course.

We approach a small grey house at the foot of the hill and I finally realize Caleb still hasn’t told me whom he lives with.

I leave the car, Caleb takes the suitcase. We enter the house. I give it a look. A small hall leads to a cosy sitting room. There are dark curtains covering the windows, a fluffy carpet on the floor. I can make out a vase with a huge bunch of white roses on a small dressing-table.

Caleb notices the direction of my look.

«It’s for you, Beatrice.» Caleb smiles radiantly. «Welcome home.»

He goes on talking but I can’t make myself listen. Where’s Four?

«Hi, Tris!»

I turn around, but it’s just Christina.

She’s got even slimmer and has grown long hair. She’s trying to smile, but is watching me cautiously. She’s wearing a khaki jacket and khaki trousers.

«Look, Beatrice!» says Caleb. He sounds like an idiot. «Your best friend has arrived from the centre of Chicago to help throw a party for you.»

«Yeah,» Christina says watching the floor. «I’ve baked a strawberry pie. Have no slightest idea how it should’ve been made, but it ended up being not that bad. Al least it smells good.»

«I have no sense of smell.»

«I’m sorry. But I hope you’ll try it. I got really fucked cooking it. Begged two patrols off for its bloody sake.»

«Patrols?» I ask.

«Christina…» Caleb beseeches.

«Patrols,» Christina replies not looking at him. At me neither. — Not all the Risen have undergone the treatment and someone has to protect people, you know.»

I want to slap her, but this way she’s probably going to start protecting humankind from me.

«Are former Dauntless in charge?»

«Yeah, the ones who survived The Rising.»

That’s great. Now I see why my friends haven’t come to celebrate my homecoming. Seems I haven’t got any friends.

«Four too?»

«Yes.»

Certainly. What did I hope for?

«Tris…» I hear his voice and turn again and, finally, see him.

He’s got slimmer too and is also wearing khaki. I can see the stubble as if he hasn’t shaved for some time. He looks drunk. His irises are even more blue than they used to be.

«Have you been drinking?» Caleb resents, quite out of place. Why does he think it’s his business anyway?

«Just a beer.» Four brushes the issue off. «How’re you, Tris?»

«I’m fine. looking forward to the strawberry pie.»

He frowns as he watches me.

«You don’t eat, the likes of yours, do you?»

I have nothing to say.

I’ve been waiting for us to meet since I recovered consciousness. So, we’ve met. Well done.

«Hey, Christina! Let’s go lay the table!» Caleb says, his voice too cheerful to sound sincere.

We stay alone. I want to hug him, but I’m too afraid.

«How are you, Tobias?»

«Alright. Work on patrol. Got some benefit, as, you know, the hero of the rising. The hero of Revolution, too. Dauntless turned out to be a good choice in the end.»

«May I hug you?»

He gives me a weird look, then nods. I come up to him and bury my head on his chest.

I wanna feel his warmth, but it’s all in vain, cause I fucking can’t feel.

Tobias caresses my hair and I see how hard it is for him.

We’ve got so much to get used to, but everything will be alright. I will cover my face with fucking mousse, wear fucking contacts and I can pretend all the time, only to make everything alright.

«Welcome to the table!» Caleb says entering the sitting room.

«It’s not what you think it is…» Tobias says quickly. Is it embarrassing for him to hold me in front of my brother? Is it embarrassing to hold what I’ve become?

«I’ll join Christina if you need to stay alone.But don’t expect us to wait and not to start the pie until you’re done.»

«Caleb, don’t be so self-sacrificing, it pisses me off.» Tobias says angrily and once again I fail to understand him. He may have no opportunity to take me to his place. May he feel guilty since Caleb has to?

Everyone is silent as we are having dinner. I’m trying to chew the fucking pie but feel no taste. Four and Christina are exchanging these weird looks all the time. I understand their prejudice, understand what they feel. They just need some time.

«The pie was a miracle!» Caleb exclaims. «Christina, you’re a chef prodigy. Give up your stupid gun runs and open a restaurant.»

«I’ll consider this» Christina replies sourly. «Time to go, guys. I’ll call on you one day. Tris, don’t you mind?»

«Of course I don’t. Looking forward to it!»

She is just uneasy. It’s hard on her. I should remember that.

«Will you give Four a lift?» Caleb asks.

I just want him to shut up. I can’t bear the thought of Tobias leaving. We only need to stay alone.

«No problem.» Christina says.

And Four bangs his fist against the table.

«Stop it.» he shouts. «I won’t go anywhere!»

I feel hope, then elation. Eat it, brother.

«But, Four, please… Thought we have arranged it.» Caleb replies helplessly.

«Fuck it. I won’t go.»

«Caleb, please!» I join in.

«Beatrice! You don’t understand!»

«What is it I don’t understand? Why can’t he just stay?»

«I can» Tobias says vaguely. «Actually. I live here.»

Now I really fail to understand. Has he moved to live with us?

«Four!» Caleb seems close to bursting into tears. «Please, stop it! She needs to get accustomed, at least a little bit…»

Tobias doesn’t listen.

«Tris»— he finally tells me. «I won’t lie, won’t cheat. I live here. With your brother.»

«What do you mean?»

Out of the corner of my eye I see Christina rise and leave.

Caleb’s hands are trembling.

«Lots of things have changed,»Tobias says. «You died. I lived alone, for a year. Didn’t want to see anyone, to hear from anyone. And then Caleb…»

Suddenly it hits me.

I literally jump from the table and run to the bathroom. Lock the door. Someone is banging on it. Caleb. Four hasn’t even followed.

«Beatrice! Please, let me in! Beatrice!»

I want to cry, but I can’t. I come to the mirror and get rid of my contacts. My reflection is looking at me with the ugly, hollow eyes of a PDS-sufferer. 

The eyes of a fucking zombie.

I run the tap and start taking the mousse off.

«Beatrice!» Caleb rattles from behind the door.

How many times do I have to die? Is one time not enough?

«Everything’s gonna be alright, Beatrice! You just need to get used to it!»

I just need to get used to it.


	2. Chapter 2

Tobias's POV

 

Three days had passed since Caleb brought her here. She hadn’t left her room, and, well, somewhere deep in my soul I was really grateful for that.

Maybe I should have gone upstairs, knocked at her door and tried to talk to her, tell something, explain… But I had buried Tris three years before and her homecoming was something like an exhumation. Hi, sweetheart. You know, while you were lying in your cozy grave I nearly kicked the bucket myself, but then I somehow managed to come to my senses, and then I started fuckibg your brother, and then (yeah, too many thens here, but it’s been three years, you know) corpses began to come out from the earth and we had to shoot the head, because otherwise they’d have feasted on our brains. You must understand it, sweetheart, since you were there too and you did gobble brains too, truth to be told. And now your brother (whom I do fuck, let’s not forget about it) has brought your walking corpse, insists on fixing everything and living together and he wants me to discuss what wallpaper you will like.

Well, I may be a pathetic psycho, but I still understand that it’s not right.

«Four,» Caleb said in his usual quiet manner.

«Hmm?»

«Have you visited her?»

«Nah»

He gave me this reproachful look, again. His mean lover hadn’t supported the perfect plan, what the fuck?

The guy had always believed life was to fit his schemes, but suddenly the scheme collapsed, so he just found the one to blame. Love him.

Well, it may sound wild, but I really do.

«I’ve been there. At the door. She… Beatrice doesn’t answer» Caleb stumbled. «Is she alright? What do you think?»

«I don’t think she’s alright. She’s, you know, dead.»

«Asshole.»

It occurred to me that I should have approached him, hugged him, tried to comfort. But, first of all, Caleb had always taken the lead when it came to talking, secondly, I also somehow was a victim here, and, thirdly, he’d been living on his guilt and redemption all these years after his sister’s death. Before the Rising I’d been his only source of sublimation, but now I was the second priority. Fuck, we had sex only once since the government informed him his sister was in the treatment centre, and he was not reluctant to move to another room leaving me behind.

«Caleb, stop it!»

«But you loved her!»

«I used to. When she was alive.»

Yeah, according to his perfect «Beatrice is at home, everyone’s happy and drinking champagne including those who can not drink at all» scheme I must have already remembered the past and carry this new Tris in my arms in the fields of daisies. And, maybe, I should have met Caleb secretly in some forsaken house at weekends. Or, maybe, shouldn’t have met him at all.

Fuck, Caleb, I killed so many zombies with my own hands that, looking at Tris’s face all I can see is blood and pieces of brains falling out of grinning mouths. I wished I’s never seen it.

He turned away and left me sitting on the chair. Anyway, when you live under the same roof with a zombie, at least you don’t have to share the restroom. It’s a plus if you look closer.

I don’t know how long I was sitting there staring at the wall, at the very place where the wallpaper had just started to come unstuck.

It seemed to me it was enough for me not to notice Caleb return.

«Four!» he called anxiously, and I was close to believing the guy had overviewed his priorities.

«Yeah?»

«Beatrice’s gone!»

That was unexpected. Though… who am I trying to cheat? It was strange enough she had been staying inside all this time, considering her temper.

«How can you tell? She never answers your knocking».

«It’s the window in her room. It’s wide open. I saw it and opened the door with my key.»

He looked so scared and helpless, that, for the first time, I felt pity.

I came up to him and took him into my arms. Caleb flinched.

«Сome on!» I ordered. «It’s time to look for her. She can’t have gone too far away.»

«What if she runs into…?» he touched the patrol patch on my jacket. Don’t ask me why I didn’t remove my uniform at home.

It was just not very comfortable to live near a zombie.


	3. Chapter 3

Tris's POV

The tireless sun is going round and round across the sky behind my window. Caleb knocks at my door every hour. He asks me to open, starts explaining something, tries to remember some long-forgotten events from our childhood. He may think it’s the best way to make me speak to him, I can’t say for sure, but I just don’t want to talk to him.

I’m still waiting for Tobias, but he never comes. I’m thinking of telling Caleb about my wish, he can do something. But it’s not an option - my brother is smart enough and if he were able to get Tobias he would have done it already. I have no idea why he is doing all these things, but he can do a lot to achieve his goal.

The good thing is that I’ve got my neurotriptaline and I was taught to make injections on my own. But every time I do it I’m thinking whether the game is worth the candle. In the worst-case scenario I’ll just go nuts and Tobias will shoot me down. That’s gonna be the easiest way out for everyone.

I’m watching the sun reaching the zenith and suddenly realize that I haven’t walked freely for a long, long time.Since i died, actually, and I still have nightmares about the night we rose. Not the nicest dreams, frankly speaking. I can hardly say if it was for real, but I was hitting someone on the head until the skull burst, and then I dug my fingers into…

I can’t feel anything, but I’m sick anyway.

The autumn’s beginning there, behind my window, I can clearly see green leaves and raindrops sparkling in the pavement’s cracks, although the room’s on the second floor, but the ground seems very close. And I’m a Dauntless, I used to jump off trains, fall on the net, fly high above the city, how can these five meters even matter?

And actually I have nothing to lose.

I open my window, climb on the window sill and jump.

I even manage to draw my knees under the chest and it doesn’t hurt. It’s not really surprising.

The gate is open and I come out.

The district where Caleb lives (I still refuse to accept that so does Four) is totally different from the place where we grew up. There’s a lot of green here and lots of small gray cottages instead of blocks of flats. Only the puddles on the pavement are similar to the ones I’ve been used to since childhood. Children from Amity used to splash in them, but little Abnegators couldn’t take such liberties.

I don’t see ant people in the street yet, but I already wish I was wearing mousse  
and lenses. Let it be, but I don’t feel safe without them.

A woman appears at the door of a nearby house and I cross the road as fast as I can. I am eager to talk to anybody about the changes, the factions, but my fear is too strong. Why have I left the house at the first place? Is the world as scary as Caleb told me? I’m just stuck in lies.

«Hey, rotter, what’re you doing here?»

The voice sounds oddly familiar and I turn around.

There is a short dark-haired man wearing khaki in front of me. Four wears the same uniform. Looks like I’m in trouble.

I stare at his face not knowing how to react, and, finally, recognize him.

The only option for me is to run. My body, as dead as it is, remembers what to do, so I punch him in the stomach and rush to the house. It’s not the best place ever but at least there’s someone who can help me. I hope Four won’t take my hand and hand me over to his friend with apologies.

I run barely seeing my way and almost bump into Tobias who grips hold of me.

«Tris, you alright?»

I feel pleased, because he calls my name.

«Yeah, I…»

I look around.

«Where’s Caleb?»

«He’s gone to check another street. You alright? You look pale.»

Of course I do, I’m a zombie without any make up. He could just spill it - there’s no mousse on your face. It would be funnier, though I have no reason to laugh right now.

«Tobias,» I say.

«Yeah?»

«I’ve seen him. I’ve just seen him.»

«Whom?»

His hands are still on my shoulders.

«Him. Peter.»


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still alive, my English is still bad, but... Here we are)

Tobias's POV

 

I just hugged her and we went back home. Well, there was something weird about it. Imagine it — a romantic evening like that, I’m was walking along the streets holding the hand of a walking corpse. But now, scared and shaking with fear, she reminded me of herself, the Tris I used to know. Maybe it was about the height difference — watching her fair-haired head from above I didn’t see… Didn’t see anything. But the scariest thing was that even ay that moment I didn’t feel anything close to what I used to feel. May the reason have been me, not her? I found the thought disgusting.

On the other hand… Well. Tris and me… We used to kiss and talk about love. It used to seem everything back then, but now I had Caleb, who’d been cooking for me, washing my clothes and making love with me for two years, even if the latter could hardly be called like that. It might sound stupid, but I fought Erudites and Evelyn’s henchmen, and I also kicked zombie asses all the time, but I kicked zombie asses wearing clean socks and having regular meals. Sounds cynical, but there’s something nice about it, you know. The full hero. Not so romantic, but much more efficient.

"Tobias?", Tris asked. "Does Peter live here? Not far from us?»

I wished Caleb had been with us. He would piss himself with joy on hearing this «us». When he learnt his sister was… well, half alive, the first thing on his mind was changing the house. He’d always had that sort of methodological thinking, that was an absolutely necessary thing when it came to nesting in a house of his own. He’d put his heart into redecoration. Sometimes I think he doesn’t care what exactly he is doing — working on vaccines, human experiments or designing a dining-room. The only thing he’s interested in is drawing a plan, dividing it into phases and paying attention to details.

And, concerning Peter… I saw no sense in lying.

"He does live in the town, it just happened to be like that. A couple of months ago some mad zom… I mean, PDS started to appear in the area, A dozen of patrols officers were sent here, him too. I was against it, but wasn’t the one to choose."

"He hates me."

"He doesn’t remember you. Peter took some serum to forget everything."

"But why?"

I smiled.

"Realized what an asshole he was and decided to have a fresh start."

Tris frowned.

"A funny way to pay for one’s sins. I wouldn’t disagree to choose it, too.»

"It won’r work on you. You can ask Caleb anyway."

"Do you really want me to forget everything?»

Fuck, I was caught off guard again. What an awkward moment. In my thoughts I was shouting for Caleb to come, but he was nowhere to be seen. The son of a bitch always made it better when it came to some real things like choosing vegetables in shops (I was still scared of the system of buying things for money), dong housework, socializing with redecorating team and talking to zombies who were craving for love and care.

"Tris.."

And finally I did something I should’ve done long ago. I hugged her again, even tighter this time. Well, she really was going to live with us, something like a pet zombie. Stranger things happened, if you ask me.

"It is uncomfortable for you to stay outside, isn’t it?» I asked.

"And how would you feel if there was no one but PDS around, shouting something like «You, alive bastard» just on seeing you?"

"Can’t say it would be a pleasant experience. You don’t forget about your meds, do you?" 

Tris giggled nervously.

"Have I gone mad already? I’m I trying to dig into your brain?"

I looked at her, pretending to be checking on her state.

"Hmm… No."

"So I don’t forget."

I heard the door opening. Caleb.

Tris clenched her fists listening to his steps, but he just passed to the kitchen. I heard him fetching the kettle and putting it on the stove.

"Will you have tea with us?"

Tris sighed and nodded.

«Hey, what’s that… Happening with you both? Since when have you been… You know, like that.»

I shrugged my shoulders.That painful feeling of awkwardness — was that what they call ‘being friends instead?"

"Well, it didn’t work out with girls, you know. They either lied to me or died."

"I’m sorry.»

"Never mind."

"No, I’m serious,» Tris looked down. "I’m glad I have the opportunity to apologize. By the way, you’ve changed. Lost some weight.»

"That proves that your brothers’s shit at cooking"

Some falling dish blared in the kitchen, but Caleb preferred not to show his indignation verbally. We had to do something with it. Our place could be called everything but soundproof.

«So I’m lucky not to need food, am I not?"  
I listened carefully, but Caleb’s self-control was perfect.

The truth about it was that I just couldn’t afford to work out as much as I used to when I was in Dauntless, and these days I was much more into shooting than hand-to-hand combat. Those who disapproved of it might just go and fight a mad rotters armed with knuckles, and then we could discuss it. But, more probably, we wouldn’t due to the fact, that the braver wasn’t expected to come back in one piece.

Suddenly the doorbell rang.

"Tris," I said abruptly, «go upstairs!»

"What’s going on?"

"Just go!"

"It may be Cristina…"

"If it’s her, you’ll come back."

I grabbed her hand and pulled closer. Why the hell did we have the stairs in the hall?

Caleb was at the door already, peering into the wicket.

"Four!" he exclaimed in a loud voice, pointing at the stairs. "One of your patrol guys is here. Peter Hayes. He wants to talk to you, I suppose."

"How about opening the door?" the guest said.

"I’ll open. As soon as Four comes here."

Finally realizing how serious the situation was, Tris ran up the stairs.

I took my gun from the shelf and nodded to Caleb. He stepped back to the kitchen. I had another gun hidden there, and after the revolution even Erudites learnt how to handle weapons.

I remembered the Priors’ father and the natural skill that guy from Abnegation showed with the machine gun, and opened the door.

Peter really was alone, and this fact was reassuring. It’s not so easy to admit, but the only thing on my mind was whether the soil in our garden was soft enough to bury the body and how it will affect Caleb’s begonias.

"Hi, Hayes!" I said, putting all the effort into making myself sound as careless as possible. «What’s happened? Has anyone seen the mad ones in the forest? You could have used the walkie-talkie, we aren’t very fond of visitors."

Well, everybody in the town was aware of the fact, that almost two wars’ hero slept with another guy, but it didn’t mean we were happy to invite people for a brandy in the evening once in a while or set up family barbecues on Saturdays.

"Hi, Eton!" Peter gave me a crooked smile. "That’s not why I am here."

"Oh, really?" I almost squeezed the hilt of my revolver. 

"I need to see her. Your boy’s sister."

He looked at me and added, almost begged:

"Please."


	5. Chapter 5

Tris

It feels really stupid — I’m sitting behind the door of my room (yeah, I’ve left it just once and now it’s already managed to become "mine") and trying to overhear the conversation down there.

Peter has come, and I can only try to guess what he wants from me. He kills things like me all the time. And so do Christina and Tobias. Tobias helped me and seems to finally acknowledge my existence, but Peter can try to talk him out of it. He can tell him I have to be got rid of.

Caleb said the likes of me had the right to co-exist with people, but after my Initiation I had already seen the worth of human rights, no need to talk about PDS.

But Peter doesn’t remember anything, does he? To be honest, looking at his ratty mug I saw no difference. He’s remained the same, even Caleb, Tobias, Christina have changed, but not him.

Brother enters without knocking.

"Beatrice" he says, "Peter wants to talk to you. Without witnesses." 

"You’re nuts!" I shout. "He hates me! He will simply kill me, and no one will blame him, cause it’s his fucking job, isn’t it?"

"He doesn’t remember much, Beatrice. He’s changed."

"People never change. Peter’s a traitor."

Caleb gets pale and I realize something wrong has slipped my tongue. I wonder when I happened to lose my delicacy. Was it when I chose the coals? When my initiation was over? Or did it happen when I was getting out of my coffin?

"I’ll tell Four to make him leave. But… well, you could give him a chance," Caleb says, and he sounds surprisingly angry, "It would be really nice of you to start giving people chances."

"What chance are you talking about? The chance to shoot me down?"

"Four will take his weapons away from him."

"Four" I emphasize the nickname, mocking him "would be happy to finish me himself. I have no idea how you bend over for him so that he tolerates my presence. I’m not Tris now, am I?"

"Bullshit!" Caleb hits the doorknob, "why can’t you just believe us? Trust us? Anyone?"

"And what about you?" I want to weep. Stupid PDS body. "Do you trust me?"

"I trust you, sis" he answers quietly.

"You have betrayed me" I say bitterly, "And mom. And dad. They loved you."

I like this conversation of ours, At least it’s frank.

"I have changed, Beatrice. Since it all happened, I’ve done everything I could to change. I’ve been with the people you cared about. I…»

"Fucked my boyfriend who turned out to be like that too." I try to put all my contempt, all despisal into the words.

"He was desperate, Beatrice. He was dying grieving you," my brother’s voice is dangerously soft, "it was the least I could do."  
"It’s good my imagination is not enough to think about the most you could do."

"You know," Caleb suddenly growls, "you want everyone to prove you something and don’t even make a smallest attempt to understand. It’s so sweet, especially for the person who used to kill others to eat their brains."

"I tried to understand you. And I’m not a person. Not anymore."

Caleb doesn’t look at me.

"I’m so sorry, Beatrice. Forgive me if you can… I shouldn’t have talked to you like that."

"Tell Peter to leave".

"I think it’s better to kill him." Caleb says in a whisper. "We may bury the body in the garden. I have some flowerbeds there, he'll make a great fertilizer."

I can’t help giggling.

"Let him in then."

Well, if brother’s flowers stay without fertilizers, it will be not such a bad revenge. I only wish they wouldn’t get the double portion in the end.

"And give me a gun. Just in case."

Caleb nods and passes the weapon to me.

It’s heavy, and I feel pleased to hold it. I sit down on the edge of the bed and put the gun on my lap.

Brother leaves, and in a minute Peter enters the room wearing only his trousers.

"Fucking apologies" he says instead of greetings, «this batshit crazy Eton almost got into my pants looking for a barrel. Was weird, as far as I know what he’s into, not much to enjoy either."

He squints at my gun.

"Amazing. They just pushed me here half-naked, and now I’m in the room with an armed zombie. Never had such shit happen to me before, even when you all crept out of the earth like fucking camomiles."

Yeah, the changes in Peter aren’t that obvious

"Tell me what you need to and fuck off. Try doing something to me and I’ll kill you. I don’t look strong, but I’m a good shot, remember?"

"I don’t. "

He looks at me with some hungry attention.

"Fuck, never thought was gonna say it to a zombie… But I like you. You spit exactly what you think.»

"And I don’t like you. Have never done."  "You’re saying what you think," he repeats, and, all of a sudden, I can hear some insecurity in his words. "I know it’s a right thing to do, but the others… They don’t care. No one cares."

The things he’s talking are commonplace, especially for a Candour born, but the words sting.

I also want people to tell me the truth. Do I?

"So, what do you need?"

He hesitates.

"You are Tris Prior."

"Yeah, I am…"

I don’t know what to say.

"I know about you, but I don’t remember," Peter frowns, trying to see something in my face.

"And how did you recognize me?"

"A piece of cake. A PDS in the street, running straight to Eton I followed you. What other dead wench can live here?" he pauses. I’m waiting for the rest of the story.   
"Tris," he’s almost begging, "You remember me, right?"

"Unfortunately, I do."

«Then tell me. What do you remember?»

The question takes me off guard.   
"Tobias said you’d given up your memories."

"I did, but back then I new what I was rejecting. They just told me my name, zom… Tris. I’ve been looking for my parents, my friends, but no one seems to know me. Or they pretend they don’t. Eton, that black one, Christina, the Cara bitch… They do know, but they keep silent, like, they respect my will, shit like that. They say that Peter doesn’t exist. But, fuck, Tris, how can you respect the will of the guy who doesn’t exist? Fucking hypocrites! Look at yourself!"

Why?"

"They must be saying it all the time. That they value you, need you. Each PDS family does it, they are all like "we don’t care you’re a monster", but they are just afraid to tell the truth. You’re a fucking rotter and they would be happy to send you back to the grave you must reside in."

"You’re such a sweetie," I mock. "trying to show how Candour you are. You’ve been telling lies all your life!"   
He’s listening now, and I realized, that Peter still knows how to manipulate people. I wonder why it doesn’t make me angry. It’s weird, but it’s somehow I find our conversation funny.

"I don’t know for sure,» I begin, «but Christina used to say that you always lied when you were in Candour, since no one would have suspected that you were able to, being a child from your Faction. So you a;ways got away with that. By the way, I saw your parents once…"


	6. Chapter 6

The hour had passed, but Peter was still up, and I was beginning to worry.

Anyway, Caleb had been worrying for the whole hour non-stop.

"What are they doing there?" he grumbled.

"May be fucking " I answered. I tried at least to seem indifferent. "Relax, Caleb, your dead sis has found an alive boyfriend."

"Oh, it’s so funny, Four. If there’s something worse than death, it’s a boyfriend like that. And, well, if you had behaved nicely when she arrived we could have avoided it all."

"What do you mean by "like that"?

"If you hadn’t gone all crazy on her. Hadn’t drunk, Hadn’t thrown fits at the table, had left."

Frankly speaking, the remark was unpleasant as hell.

"If you had had guts to tell her about us, I wouldn’t have had to go throw fits."

"She wouldn’t have come over it."

I was really eager to get drunk again, but couldn’t do it with Peter in the house.

"She did in the end. Caleb, stop mothering her, Tris is strong."

"Tris? I remember you calling her a zombie in the morning."

I sighed. It had never been easy to talk to him. When he started coming to me, I was solving my problems, and then it just took the right track. We lived together, then the dead rose, he tended my wounds, things like that.

"Listen," I said. "She is a zombie, and you can’t deny it."

"But she doesn’t feel like one. She’s suffering from this attitude, can’t you see?"

"She’s suffering because she’s dead. The dead have communication problems when it comes to the living. They disappear when you stop trying to turn time back."

"Since when have you got so smart?"

I shrugged my shoulders.

"Caleb, can you calm down?"

"I am calm."

And suddenly the phone rang. Sometimes I feel nostalgic about my life in the Faction. We hadn’t had phones there, and it had been great.

I took up the receiver.

"On the phone."

"Tobias, that’s you?" it was Jake, the operator guy. «People have seen some wild zombies in the forest, to the west of the town."  
"Ok, I’m in."

"Who’s your partner?"

I had a good option right there.

"Hayes."

"He doesn’t answer the call."

"He’s at my place. Has come round to have a couple of cakes."

Jack seemed to be shocked.

"You sure? He’s strong, but… He’s batshit crazy. And you invite him to your house?"

"I was his instructor back then, when we were Dauntless. I know all about him.»

Jack had nothing to say. He was a good kid, one of those who’d crossed the Border. He knew very little about our life before the revolution. That might be the reason why he didn’t patrol the area himself. 

I went up the stairs and knocked at the door of the guest bedroom. No, Tris’s bedroom. It was high time I'd got used to it.

"Hayes, come out. Time to work."

"I’m off work today" Peter sounded really annoyed. Shouldn’t have allowed him to take the serum, he would be more afraid of me that way.

"I don’t care, it’s an emergency."

The door opened with a loud crack and I saw Peter. His chest was bare. I should have let him wear a shirt, cause he looked really disgusting.

Tris giggled, and it was disgusting too, especially with her zombie eyes. Ok, it was up to Caleb to explain to her what is proper for a decent dead lady. Maybe it would be their chance to finally talk, otherwise she’d get used to socializing with Peter only, and then they would run away, marry and not have children, because zombies aren’t able to do so.

"Hurry up," I ordered. «All your stuff’s in the hall, and I have some weapons in the car."

Peter obeyed.

I followed him not looking back.

The road was really bad, I almost bit off my tongue driving and even felt relieved when we left the car outside the forest.

"Watch my back" I instructed.

"Wow, trust me that much?"

I didn’t really trust him, but, actually, I wasn’t afraid of patrolling even on my own, though it was much simpler with Christina by my side.

"Hey!" Peter said, "Tris told me it had been you. The one who taught me everything."

"Yeah, making mistakes is an inseparable part of human nature.»

Inwardly I cursed and called Tris every name I could think of. What else had she told her new friend about?

"It’s amazing," Tris’s new friend admitted, "you’re cool."

"Thanks for the compliment."

"Tell me, Eaton… You two… sort of dated, didn’t you?"

I was starting to hate the conversation.

"Hasn’t she told you?"

"She has. But, well, lots of things have happened since that, and she’s not alive. You gonna bring it back, or whatever?"

It seemed to me that it was not my personal life he was interested in.

"Nothing can be brought back. Nothing at all."

"But haven’t you ever thought of it?"

What a stupid question.

"I have. But clinging to the past we lose our present. Hayes, listen, I don’t remember adopting you, so why for the fuck’s sake do I have to be you daddy?"

"Fuck, I don’t ask you to be my daddy, I want you to answer my question. It’s clear Tris’s dead as a doornail and your sweet boy’s alive and kicking, warm and nice…"

"Peter," I offered gloomily, "would you like me to break your jaw?"

He ignored the threat.

"But if you had the chance to bring it back, would you just leave everything as it is?"

"Fuck, Peter, there were moments when I wanted it, but if you change your present, not your past, you have more opportunities. And no, I wouldn’t like to lose what I have now."

"You’re lucky, you have something."

"You have something you’ve chosen yourself, is it not enough for you?"

I turned to Peter looking straight into his ratty eyes. Well, his eyes were ok, but still he was pissing me off.

Suddenly his face changed.

"Fuck, Eaton, behind you!"

I didn’t have time to turn around.

There was a sudden pain in my neck, and I heard a gunshot.

And then everything went dark.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, you'll be laughing, but I'm updating) Only a tiny epilogue is left here.  
> Sorry for the year it's taken, but I was sure no one needed it)

Tobias leaves alongside with Peter, and I stay in the room alone.

Knock, knock. Someone is at the door.

“Come in, Caleb!” I say loudly. “It’s open”.

He comes in and carefully closes the door behind himself.

“He’s done nothing wrong, has he?”

“Nope. He just wanted to talk about the past. You know, just to learn what everyone blames him for.”

My brother is looking down. Again.

“Please, Beatrice, could you just stop it? Trust me, I’ve taken my time contemplating on it.”

I would like to tease him about his relationship with Tobias, but suddenly I feel sort of ashamed, for it seemingly causes him pain. 

“I’m sorry, Beatrice. I just wished to live for you, too, cause it all had turned out to be like that. Wanted to make him smile for you weren’t there for us. It wasn’t simple, you know. And I am ready to give it up, I really am, ‘cause I wish you were happy.”

“Are you?”

He hesitates, then nods. I have no idea why, but I do believe him.

“And is he ready to do it?”

Caleb shrugs his shoulders.

“It’s up to you both. None of my business, to tell the truth.”

“Don’t you think that your addiction to abnegation is kind of selfish?”

Brother smiles reluctantly.

“You are talking just like Dad now”

“It’s nice to hear.”

“I didn’t want them to die, I swear. I don’t know how it happened. I was obsessed with her, with Janine. She said divergents could destroy us all, and we were to sacrifice anything to stop them.”

“And you believed her?”

One more time, Caleb shrugs his shoulders.

“I was a dumbass. People need to believe, that there is some threat — people from the outside, divergents, PDS…”

“Caleb, don’t get bombastic, please. Listen, could you tell me… Have they left to hunt zombies?”

Caleb cracks his fingers nervously. His awkward attemts to protect me from everything are getting annoying  
.  
“Will you answer me?”

“Yes,” he says quietly.

“Can we follow them?”

“Beatrice!” he exclaims. “Are you nuts? Why do you need it?”

“Well, I’d be with them anyway, wouldn’t I? I mean, if I hadn’t died.”

“Don’t be stupid and stay at home. They are paid for, you know.”

“Caleb,” I say calmly. “If you don’t take me there, I’ll walk.”

“Beatrice!”

“Oh, come on! Who should I be afraid of? Zombies?”

“Patrols,” brother answers gloomily, and I realize he’s already laid his arms down.

“Shall I jump out of the window?”

“Put the mousse on. And don’t forget about the lenses,” his voice is icily cold. “There is nothing I need less than having to explain the patrol why I’m taking you to the forest full of wild PDS.”

“Tell them you’ve decided to arrange a friends’ reunion” I bite back, but go to the bathroom obediently. Sometimes you have to compromise.

It doesn’t take long to reach the forest and to find Tobias’s jeep parked nearby. Caleb switches on his flashlight, and I look for footsteps on the ground. I’ve got a gun Caleb has given me “just in case”, and I don’t want to think about who I’m going to shoot at.

I feel we’ve chosen the right direction, and suddenly I can hear a scream.

We rush through the bushes, and I’m terrified to see Tobias lying on the ground and a zombie leaning over him.

He hardly bears any resemblance with the thing I see in the mirror day by day. His face is crippled with a strange grimace, and something black is flowing out of his mouth.

I want to shoot, but I just can’t – we are the same, that creature and me. And I can see the pain in his eyes.

I hear a shot, and the bullet hits the zombie’s forehead. No. not the zombies. The PDS. Partially death syndrome’d human.

Caleb lowers his gun and runs to Tobias. I notice, that his skull is unharmed, so he must be alive.

But where’s Peter?

“Peter?” I shout, desperately.

“Tris!” he answers from somewhere behind the bushes, and I rush to the sound of his voice. I can see brother whispering something to Tobias.

I find myself on a clearing and see Peter. He has no gun and is trying to protect himself from two PDS using some wooden stick – God knows where he’s found it.

“My gun!” he yells. “I’ve dropped my gun”

The flashlight is left with Caleb, but my revolver is still in my hand, still not used and virgin.

I could finish them.

I should finish them.

“Stop it!” I say in a loud voice. “Go away! Leave him alone!”

Both people turn. Their faces are so scary to look at.

“I am one of you! Leave him! Go!”

They start walking towards me, and I’m panic-stricken to realize that there is the mousse on my face, and lenses in my eyes. Peter tries to hit one of them with his stick, but it’s useless.

“Leave!” I nearly cry, and then a miracle happens. They just turn and vanish in the darkness of the forest.

“What the fuck” Peter curses lifelessly as I sink onto the ground.

“You could have shot” he adds.

“It’s not the way” I whisper. “They should be treated, not killed”.

“Like all of us,” Peter chuckles wryly. “Though we seem to be more like a lost cause”.

He spits.

“By the way, you’ve saved my ass, rotten girl. I owe you this one.”

“Eat it!” I reply angrily.

“No way,” Peter’s deadly serious, and his manner makes me shiver. “I hate debts.”

I recognize the Peter I used to know in my previous life. Ok, just life.

And then he adds:

“Well, let it be. I’m taking you on a date.”

I start to laugh hysterically.

“Oh, shut it out!” Peter spits out. “Your boyfriend dumped you for a guy, you should be grateful to me until your dying day… Shit, sorry.”

“It’s not funny, dumbass.”

“Oh, come on,” he gives me an evaluating look. “By the way, in the dark you are not that ugly.”

“Oh, sorry,” I growl. “Zombies are not the ones to win beauty contests, you know.”

“Oh, I wish being a zombie was the reason…”

I really long for hitting him on the head. But suddenly it strikes me that I don’t know this Peter Heyes, not at all. Ans I don’t know myself either.

“Ok, dumbass,” I say. “So be it, I’ll go on a date with you. But just once. And don’t even try to make a pass on me – I’ll break your neck immediately.”

“Don’t flatter yourself. I know better than to feel up a rotter, least of all an ugly one. Well, I would visit a PDS brothel… I mean, once. Well,” he falters. “Let’s go and help your bro to fetch your shared boyfriend to the car before he manages to do it on his own and leaves us here.”

“Ok,” I answer. “But you seem to misunderstand something. I’m single.”


End file.
